Daylight Spending

Posted on January 27, 2011 by Jeff

Daylight Spending.

Thank you Energy Savings Act of 2005.  Thank you American Government for deciding to mess with us by having us change our clocks ahead a few weeks early.  Next, you’ll decide to give everyone a hundred bucks to counter high energy costs…. Oh wait… nevermind.

Thanks to the Energy Savings Act of 2005 we are springing ahead our clocks tonight. This way our cell phones can be an hour off.  Our online calendars can be messed with.  You know who’s laughing now?  Those people like Anthony Hilden who use a Franklin Planner.  Those will be unaffected.

I personally am stocking up on canned goods for the chaos that is about to ensue at 2 am tomorrow.  People will be showing up an hour late!  People will be sitting down for lunch on Monday saying “wow, it totally doesn’t feel like lunchtime”.

I strongly feel that the very last thing we need in America is to mess with the Planetary Rotation just to add more daylight so we have more time to do more stuff.  We don’t need to do more stuff.  Everybody needs to chill a bit.  Maybe we should spring back about 3 hours and spend the long evenings at home, chilling with our families.

Or perhaps if this is successful, we should up the anti next year (‘anti’ is a poker term and I apologize to those who are religiously opposed to card games) and create an orbital device that could reflect the Sun’s power on us 24 hours a day.  This would be similar to the one in that James Bond movie a few years ago.  Only instead of Laser Power intended to take over the world by melting glaciers (Al Gore already has one of those) this would be used to give us 24 hour daylight whence we could become even more productive and do more stuff.  Let me first invest in Starbucks.

Or, perhaps, did God know what he was doing when he set the planets in motion?  He may have said to Himself.  “The USA, My favorite country, will have some long evenings in the winter, but that’s OK, they can use the time to chill out a bit”.

We may not have a problem in SAVING daylight.   Our problem might be on how we’re SPENDING it.  Mmmmmmmmmmm.

The good part of the early ‘Spring Forward’ There are a bunch of clocks currently an hour ahead in our house because I never got to them last October when we fell back and hour.

Procrastination indeed, my friends.